You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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