Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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