Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
