The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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