I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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