i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
