Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
i think my cat just said my name.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
