there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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