The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
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