You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
