Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
