Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
