Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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