get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
