i would punch a child for taco bell
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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