you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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