I cockslap morals
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize