So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
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And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
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I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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