good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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