Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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