what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
