just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
