the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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