I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
