Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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