For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
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