I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
