Someone shit on the floor
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
