i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
She needs sedatives and a leash
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
