You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
