I'm eating all of the evidence.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
