why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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