I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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