about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
