You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
