I just threw up on my dentist
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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