I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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