Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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