this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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