Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
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Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
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I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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