so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
