In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
