No awkward lesbian experiences without me
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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