whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
