is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
