He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
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