DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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