bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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