You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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