I understand why you refuse to be sober now
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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