I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize