All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
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